Inhale, exhale

I don't know if anything has really changed here since the last time I wrote you. At least on the surface level. We are still working with several investigators that you know about. I am still changing and learning every day.

Tomorrow is the first transfer. I don't believe that it's really here. Somebody is tricking me. I'm not being transferred so I'll be here another six weeks in the good ole Oak Harbor area. Elder Davis, my best buddy out here, is getting transferred though so that's not my favorite part of the day. I think I will still have my same companion. But I don't know for sure.

There is a less active man in our ward who we meet with every so often. His wife has been really sick for the past two years or so and passed away on Thursday. We went over to do service at his house and he told us the news. I can't imagine how he feels. He has two girls and travels back and forth from Utah to Washington because of his job. He asked if we could be Pall Bearers at the funeral so that's what I'll be doing tomorrow at 11:00 am. I hope I don't cry.

I was having a really rough morning on Thursday and decided to look at all of my pictures of you guys. I was sad at first and then I saw a picture of Kenna and heard her laugh when she's like embarrassed and stuff and is falling over cause she's laughing so hard. That made me smile. Then I saw a picture of Lindz and heard her laugh too and pictured us being down stairs at 3:00 in the morning laughing our heads off and Mom coming down to glare at us and that made me laugh a little bit. Then saw a picture of the whole family and imagined all of your individual laughs and especially Dad's little snicker where he covers his mouth and goes hehehe.. And Mom's laugh where she starts crying because she can't help how hard she's laughing. By the end of picturing all of that I was laughing out loud and felt so much better. I just had to tell you about it.

I am being blessed beyond what I ever thought was possible. The Lord answers my prayers in the most amazing ways. I have never had this type of trust before. Where I can truly rely on God and know that He is there to help me because I am here only to help Him. How can I doubt that he will make my pathway straight and clear the way for me to bring my brothers and sisters back to Him. He is mindful of every single person that I see on the street. There is a man sitting next to me in the library right now. We've never talked. I don't know a single thing about him. All I know is that he is loved more powerfully than I can even have the capacity to love. By that same God who loves me. How can I not love this man next to me too?

An email back and forth on his p-day:

aww... momma you are the best!! I tried to think of what I could give you to pay you back for all that you do for me... i thought about building you a kingdom and letting you rule the land. but i don't know if you would like that. so i thought buying a library and letting you have it because you love reading. maybe you would like that. but i think you find the most happiness in your family's happiness. so i'm going to be happy. for you momma. I'm going to be the best missionary in the world just so that you can see how good of a mother you are. I'm serious.


Elder Merrill