there and back again: They Who Call Me Elder: January 27, 2014

Hi, I am a missionary from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Some call me Merrill... the ones who understand call me Elder. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ, the Son of God. I have been called of Him to declare His word among His people, that they might have everlasting life. My call is greater than myself. I am a weak mortal man with a Prophetic and Divine commission. Some days I understand those things. Some days I wish I did.

I believe in a lot of things... Miracles, love, change, progression. I believe that, "Man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend." I've certainly come to understand this perspective even more this week. I'm up against the wall of faith again. I don't feel uncomfortable here... this is where I learn, think and feel the most. I've been challenged. I have doubts. I have answers. I have questions. It seems that every time that I'm in this sort of a soul searching predicament, I find the answer that satisfies the seeming doubts. Usually when I talk about these kinds of experiences with you I've waited until I've found an answer. Now, I haven't found what I'm looking for. I'm still looking and searching. I realize the vagueness of this description but I can't explain the specifics very well on paper as of yet. The purpose of saying this is for everyone to know that there are answers to the doubts. There is clarity that comes after the trail of fog. It's this refining process that helps us experience the wonderful things that I believe: Miracles, love, change, progression. I love this.

I had a day that seemed like one big evidence of God's hand in my life. I was on a split with the WML and had a lesson with our investigator. She's on date to be baptized for February 22nd and also lives with her boy friend right now. I've been so worried about what might happen when we bring up the law of chastity with her. The moment came that my anxiety was anticipating. We had the lesson and I tried to secretly sneak in this concern. As I held my breath to wait for her response she melted away all my worries with a faithful and humble answer. She had already been thinking she should move out. She is wonderful.

At the same time as that lesson Elder Pymm was on a split with President Nelson (Institute teacher) with another investigator, our hilariously sarcastic Catholic friend. I'm not too sure what went on in there but he's on date for the 21st of March now. They were both at church along with a new investigator.

An hour before both of those lessons James brought two friends for us to teach to institute. An hour before that we were with our investigator, that we met at her fire escape door, talking to her about some of those gospel truths we all tend to love. An hour before that I taught district meeting because one of our district leaders was at the doctors. It was one of "those days"... in a beautiful way. I don't know why I'm going so out of chronological order here but I'll go ahead and jump to after all those many lessons and miracles and show you what the evening looked like that same day.

A couple months ago Elder Pectol and I contacted a girl. She was a good contact but she wasn't too interested. Well just this week we got a call from her asking if we could teach her church about what Mormons believed. "Why, yes! That would be a dream for us..." So we did. Six o'clock rolled around on this busy day. I was poorly portraying in the previous paragraphs. We arrived at the 100+ year old Methodist building. We tried about four different doors before we found the one that was accessible. With sweat of anticipation and exertion dampening our forehead, we finally made it to the body of Methodists. It was a room full of college girls ha. Luckily there was an old man there who we hung with most of the time named Dick. Dick's the man. Anyways, it was a night full of Q's & A's, pizza and ice cream. I don't know how well it touched their hearts but we both felt confident in our responses and instruction. We were invited to inform, not to convert....though, I prefer the latter. It was a learning and interesting experience. I liked it.

I think the description of that day is good for now. Oh, and I was able to confirm James yesterday. It was wonderful. I love him.

Standing next to an angel