Welcome to the Good Life

I woke up this morning and sat under a dim light and tried being honest with myself. I felt.... happy. That kind of happiness isn't too easy to find without Christ. I might even go so far to say that it's impossible. I feel really grateful today. More so than usual. My heart rate is steady, my hands are sure, my mind is clear while the sun is shining on all those who live in Oak Harbor. Happy day for the believer who once called himself Trent.

That's me workin the scarf. I don't know why I look so unhappy.

This has been a week of thoughts outside of the box. We started to notice that our stats were going down one night and we were thinking... that's probably not good. So we took a good hard look at what we were doing. Most of the time, if we didn't have lessons or appointments, we would just knock some doors till our knuckles were sore... then we knocked some more. It actually hasn't been terribly ineffective but I'm thinking there's some better ways that we haven't looked into. So we started brainstorming and reading Preach My Gospel for some more finding ideas. We went to the hospital and signed up as clergy to talk to people who are in crises. Hopefully that goes well. We have a ministerial certificate from the Prophet. We'll talk with the Chaplin to see if we can make that happen. We are going to shake it up here on the Island and make something special happen... hopefully. I am praying a lot for ideas and for inspiration for what we can do here to bring more souls to that happiness that comes in the early morning... under dim lights. You know what I'm talking about.

I love riding the bus to different parts of our area. We always get into interesting conversations. People come up to us and ask us things like, "Can Mormons wear Pajamas?" and, "Where does the word Celtic come from?" That wasn't just an exaggerated example.. Those are the questions from this week ha... and then we get the opportunity to share what we really believe. The Truth.

Thanksgiving was good. I forgot to say that earlier. I figured you would want me to touch on that somewhat. It was like a full day p-day so we just played games at a members house with the other Elders and laughed our heads off. The mom was just dying laughing and it made me laugh the whole night. It was pretty dang fun.

Last night we were looking in the area book and saw a former investigator who was taught seven years ago ha. We looked at each other and figured what the cuss... why not. So we stopped by and the husband was like, "What do you guys want!?" And I kind of ignored him ha and asked if his wife needed help carrying in the stuff in her hands. Then they opened up and we joked around for a bit and they invited us in for some Hot Cocoa. We talked with them about life, family and deception pass. They were so nice to us and we set up a lesson with them for this Friday so I'm quite giddy. Like.... pretty dang giddy. I don't really like that word. I'm excited.

My planning mustache. It's my muse. 

Elder Pectol's planning mustache.

Last night I was at Dinner at a members house and the husband is taking philosophy right now. His wife said that he's always complaining, "Ugh why doesn't Elder Merrill just come over right now and help me." haha I had him print out some of his essay questions because I was so excited to read them.. It seems i'm quite nerdy..

Today I think we'll play some basketball because I haven't done that yet. Then we'll hit up some thrift stores and get some christmas decorations and I don't know just have a chill day.

Well this day is to you my dear family and friends,

Elder Trent Jay Merrill

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Greetings everyone. I love you.

So this week was what we've all been waiting for... just kidding i'm sure you weren't waiting for it... but I have definitely been waiting for this for a long time. I got a new companion, Elder Pectol. I love him. We are just tearing it up out here. Crazy things are happening. I also have new challenges... which is good. I need some failure to keep me in the right frame of mind. Of my own nothingness. Ooh I love when that really sinks in. When I really feel so powerless and hopeless that I spend the day almost bruising my knees so that I can have relief. I am a little too hard on myself sometimes... maybe.

First things first: Elder Pectol. He's from Heber City Utah. He likes sports, the beatles and skateboarding. He also is entirely chill with everything. He's a great missionary.

The PECTOLNATOR!! 

Me and Him

Him and Me

 

Second: Crazy things are happening. So for some reasons all of these miracles hitting us in the face. We got a referral from mormon.org to visit a man. Apparently, those referrals don't work out very often so my hopes weren't too high when we contacted him. We tried his address the first night and he said come back another time. So we went back the next day and he wasn't there. He called later that night and said to come back. So we went back there the next day and sat down with him. We asked him what he was hoping to get with meeting with us and he said, "Oh I just want to join your church." Ha so... hopefully we can help him out with that one.

We got another referral from a lady in our ward. So we contacted that referral and he came to church with us yesterday. He's this biblical and philosophical scholar... kind. So he knows a lot of the deep doctrine of the church so that's going to be an intense lesson. We clicked right off the bat though so I'm not too worried. Plus, I don't really have to ever worry because the spirit is my best buddy out here and hasn't let me down.

I just did P90x again today. I've done it so many times. I keep upping the reps every time so I am kicking Tony Horton's butt!! Yes I do have P90x memorized now. So I do the chest and back two times a week and legs and shoulders (a mixture work out) once a week. Then jump rope the other three days.

That's awesome about Merissa. Tell her congrats for me. (Trent's cousin just received her mission call to Concepcion Chili!)

It's pretty cool here because I feel like I know everyone really well. And everyone knows me. So they all come up to me at church and we joke around. And in ward council they ask my opinion and I am really involved with it all. It feels pretty good. I don't want to leave this place. It'll be way weird and hard to adjust.. but in all likelihood i'll be going to a new area a week before Christmas. No good.

So that's all for now folks,

Elder Trent Jay Merrill.

Fam Fam: I'm excited for Thanksgiving because 1: it's p-day and we'll play some sick sports because Elder Pectol likes playing ball and stuff. 2: it's thanksgiving. yummy food. 3: no other reason but I hate to leave a list at 2. Are you excited for thanksgiving? It's not my P-day today but we have permission to email since p-day got moved to thanksgiving day and the libraries won't be open then. pretty sweet!!

The Fan is on Medium

This is the space between the second hand's tick. Where I anticipate the inevitable. Where time slows down just enough to make me forget I'm even waiting. In a couple hours I'll get a new companion. I'll still be on the island though. It's not that big of a deal to all of you out there who are reading this. I'm not even sure if it's a big deal to me... but it feels big.. and I feel small.. because I don't have any influence over the situation. Other than to accept whatever comes my way with open arms. Wish me luck. 

The Moffets: They're a couple in our ward that I love

I am very glad that i"m staying in Penn Cove. It feels so good here. Always beautiful. I know the ward really well and don't want to leave my investigators I'm working with.

Carl was baptized! I probably should have wrote that first but I am a little distracted right now so that's my excuse. The baptism was pretty special. When he came out of the font and got dressed he came into the room and sat down and said, "I feel clean," with a huge smile on his face. It was so peaceful. I am going to miss meeting with him that often. I learned a lot from them.

Cameron Wakefield

So the lady sitting next to me in the library right now just told me her sad life story. It was quite interesting. I feel weird right now.. but in a good way. I'm grateful for not having that sad story in my own memory. I feel really bad for her too. I would never have assumed any of that if I just looked at her. It opens my eyes to see that everyone around me has problems. They all need this message and they all need God and I can help them find Him. 

Carl Smith and his wife Margaret on his big day

So Sunday night i went to dinner in first ward with elder hall. For some reason i felt peace, peace that I've never felt that strongly. It was weird. I want that always. I don't know why it came at that time but it was just like, "everything is good, everything is going to be ok. I am happy." I just wanted to tell you about it because it was really special to me. How has your week been? Thank you so much for your letters. I seriously just have no idea how I can ever thank you enough for your love and support.

Elder Trent Jay Merrill

Master of my Soul

My lovely family,

I'm sorry that I am so late to write you. It's my companions last P-day.... he wanted to go shopping and go to do some stuff with the district so that's why i'm so late. It was pretty fun though. How are you guys? Good? I hope good. Mom: I got your letter. Loved it. You wrote to my soul. Thank you so much. Also, I got the letter from Sis. Dahl from all of the YW and it was the sweetest thing in the world. Please thank her for me. I loved it. You asked me how we taught single sisters? Well we have to have an adult male with us. So we always just find members to come with us to lessons anyways. Or at least we try to.
Dad: I got your letter too and it was amazing. I especially loved how you showed the contrasting poems. That hit me in a different way than I expected because I've read the "Captain of my Soul- Invictus" one when I was in high school and thought it was the coolest thing ever. I didn't think about it the way that Orson F. Whitney wrote about it. I loved that. Thank you so much. I am so grateful for you guys. Ah man you have no idea.

So this week was pretty cool. It was probably the fastest one I've had so far. I went on two exchanges and really enjoyed them. I'm quite excited for whatever is coming my way. It could be a huge change. Next Tuesday is transfers. I'll let you know everything next email.

Carl's baptism is this Saturday. It's going to happen this time I can feel it.

One of the transfers I went on was with my Zone Leader. It was sick. He isn't allowed to drive so I cruised while we listened to some beautiful alternative christian music. The ZL's area is really big so we ended up driving like 100 or more miles that day and just talked and chilled the whole time. We taught a lot of lessons and saw a lot of miracles. It was pretty cool.

On Halloween night we all had to be in our apartments by six o'clock so we would be safe or something. I watched the testaments and had a pretty cool experience. I was thinking about the little things again. About how I can become a better person and a better teacher. I don't want to hold myself back from saving all of my friends here on Whidbey Island.... so I think about that from time to time. I think about how I can change... because I still need a lot of that. Sometimes I picture Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and I just talk to them. I ask what I can do to change. I had the conference talks and scriptures come into my head and I felt Christ ask me, "Do you love me?" and I thought about it for a while and I realized how much I do love Him. How I can stand boldly and unashamed and say, "I love you, Master," and I know he will believe me because he knows my heart. I've never been in a position to feel that way. It changes everything. That's all that matters. Everything else falls into place. The little things become big again and I start to recognize significance in everything. I really like that. I really love those moments. 

P.S. Regarding the picture: The piano was outside because I carried it down the freaking stairs!! so it was a big deal. It took ten people to take it down the first time apparently. So the lady who owned it calls me the Gorilla because I was crazy and took one side by myself. I only slightly hurt myself. It was worth it though.


The Captain of the Soul- Invictus by William E. Henley
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance,
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

The Soul's Captain [The Answer] 

by Elder Orson F. Whitney of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
Art thou in truth? Then what of him
Who bought thee with his blood?
Who plunged into devouring seas
And snatched thee from the flood?
Who bore for all our fallen race
What none but him could bear.
The God who died that man might live,
And endless glory share?
Of what avail thy vaunted strength,
Apart from his vast might?
Pray that his Light may pierce the gloom,
That thou mayest see aright.
Men are as bubbles on the wave,
As leaves upon the tree.
Thou, captain of thy soul, forsooth
Who gave that place to thee?
Free will is thine — free agency
To wield for right or wrong;
But thou must answer unto him
To whom all souls belong.
Bend to the dust that head "unbowed,"
Small part of Life's great whole!
And see in him, and him alone,
The Captain of thy soul

Walking on Blessings

Monday Oct 29, 2012

Ah my family. Man, I hope you are all happy. It's been a good and quick week for me. I am now senior companion (only because that's part of the training program) so that's been pretty fun. I don't know how much changed this week but I had a couple of cool experiences.

We came over to see a lady that we've been teaching. She's going through some tough times. I felt really bad for her. We were talking to her and reading from the Book of Mormon a little bit and in the middle of it all, the spirit told me to tell her I love her.
I was like, "Spirit, what!?"
and it was like, "tell her you love her."
I was like, "that's awkward spirit."
"don't argue with me"
So I cleared my throat to get the attention on me and then made an awkward transition into me telling her how much I cared about her. That I could actually feel the love from Heavenly Father for her. And I really could. It was so powerful that I was almost getting emotional telling her about how I felt and how God felt about her. It was cool. She had a little fleck of hope in her eyes that was never there before. I'm glad I wasn't too scared to listen to the prompting because I normally would shake those kinds of thoughts off. I'm a coward.

We had a ward Halloween party on Saturday and it was pouring rain. Absolutely pouring. I was soaked because I had to keep going out in the rain to set things up inside of the big tent that everyone was in. So that was fun. J.J. showed up too so we had a good ole time together. We made a game to shoot marshmallows out of some PVC pipe and hit targets to get some candy. It was a big deal. Lines going out the door into the rain. They couldn't handle it. Too much fun.


So.....I'm being very blessed. You guys must be praying for me and my investigators or something. I'm not baptizing everyone I see. (Which would be sick. Ha) But....I don't know... I'm helping people. I really am doing good in the world. And it's not even me. Anyone can do this. They just need to feel the way I do. It's amazing to feel this way. To feel love and concern. I was so cynical and hardened. And I meet people like that our here. I just want to give them my memories. So they know that change isn't very far away. It extends with redemptive power to anyone who receives our message.

Well only two more weeks to go until inevitable change. I hope it's the good kind. Either way I think it'll be alright. Life's pretty good out here in the real world. I still find a smile close by when we're walking in the rain. I'm never too far away from a miracle. Walking on blessings. I don't want this to go away.

Cheers to you,

Elder Trent Jay Merrill